"Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse..." These are the very familiar first words of Twas the Night Before Christmas; a poem that is read in the homes of many this time of year. I can almost envision all the little children in their pajamas, holding their favorite stuffed animal, and sitting on the floor in front of the fireplace. In a wing backed chair, their grandfather sits regally and clears his throat as he begins reading to the wide-eyed children. The rest of the family listens intently, sipping egg nog and remembering back to when they were kids. Beautiful Christmas memories.
I too have many wonderful Christmas memories from my childhood; my first kitchen set, three separate pieces made of aluminum not hard plastic; my "Chatty Cathy" doll, go figure; my first ten speed bike, a boy one because "Santa" didn't realize there was a difference and the excitement of checking to see if Santa ate the cookies I left and reading a note from him. Now that I've dated myself, I will tell you that after all these years, I can still hear my Mother singing Christmas Carole's in the kitchen as she cooked Christmas dinner and my Father played with my sister and I on the living room floor. In my head it is almost like I'm there.
Today, my Christmas memories include my grandchildren and the traditions we have started with them. But underneath the memories of smiling children, mounds of torn wrapping paper and cut out cookies, there lies a sadness that I have experienced for the past 16 years. In December, 1996, as we prepared for the Christmas season, buying gifts, planning our annual Christmas party, and decorating our home, my Mother became very ill. Six months earlier she had been told that her breast cancer had returned and this time it was in her bones. The first few weeks, were a series of roller coaster rides; one day she was good and the next, she was flat on her back for days on end. On December 18th, we took her to the doctors to be given the worst possible news, the cancer was now in her liver and her organs were shutting down. She now had to be hospitalized.
As we waited for her admission, her spirits were high, doing everything she could to soothe my broken heart and assuring me that she was not done fighting. We got her settled and we joked and laughed; she complained her room was too hot and she was determined to be at our family Christmas party just three days later. We kissed goodbye saying I love yous and went home to spend a sleepless night. The next day was like the slow creep up the first hill of a roller coaster. Mommy, was in and out of consciousness; her skin was dandelion yellow and hot to the touch. Her stomach was swollen giving the appearance of pregnancy and I knew by looking at her, it wasn't good. As we sat by her beside, the slow creep up the track seemed to be getting faster and faster. When visiting hours ended, I kissed her cheek and rubbed the short hair on her head. "I love you," I whispered in her ear and turned to leave. The night nurse assured me she would call if anything changed and we left for home and another sleepless night.
I called the hospital as soon as I got up and was told that my Mom had had a wonderful night. She had been up several times, talking and joking with the nurses and was sleeping comfortably at that moment. I hated it, but I had to go into work for a few hours that morning so, I left after my husband reassured me that he would call if anything changed. At 1:00, the descent down that sky high roller coaster slope, began. The call said, "Get to the hospital right away, it's not good." As I raced down the highway to the hospital, everything around me seemed to move in slow motion. I prayed over and over again, asking God to get there in time. I sprinted through hallways and pushed past people until I was met by her nurse at the door to her room. As I entered the room it appeared everyone had arrived before me; aunts, uncles, cousins, my sister and my husband. I rushed to her bedside and sat down on the edge of the bed. The movement didn't stir her; she lay motionless, oxygen mask on her face and machines beeping behind her bed.
I sat with my sister on the bed and we talked to her, telling her all the things we wanted her to hear, not sure she could. I thanked her for teaching me to be a mother, for loving me when I was unlovable, for helping me raise my children and for showing me what unconditional love was all about. I praised her for her courage and for the valiant way she fought this disease. I told her how very much I loved her...then on this very day 16 years ago, I gave my Mommy permission to die.
I know this all sounds very sad and depressing but some very remarkable things came out of letting her go. To that point in my life, I believed in God and I hoped there was a heaven, but at the moment of letting her go I was assured of it. As quickly as the words "It's okay to stop fighting. We will be okay." left my mouth, she opened her eyes and smiled and an amazing sense of peace washed over her. I knew at that moment she was looking in the face of Jesus and was being welcomed into heaven by my Dad and so many others we had lost. Of course there were tears from everyone in the room, but just as quickly it turned to laughter and joy as we remembered the amazing woman she was and how she would get to experience the live Nativity.
After burying my Mother just two days before Christmas, the Christmas of 1996 was hard but I had children and my Mom would have really been mad if we hadn't made it happy for them. So I swallowed my tears and painted on a smile and did just that. The Christmas' since have become easier, though I will always miss her, but the Christmas' since will never be the same, but not because she is missing.
One final request my Mom made in the days before she died was that my husband and I find a church to go to. So in the two years after her death we searched for a church for our family to attend. We tried several churches of various faiths, but we didn't feel we were "good enough" for any of them. Christmas 1998, brought us to Mountain Christian Church and we've been there every since. My Mom's final request brought us to a family that has embraced us and carried us through the rough times in our lives. We have found a peace that can only be found in Jesus Christ and we are better people for it.
Now, instead of missing my Mommy with sadness on Christmas, I miss her with joy. I thank her for her final request that brought my husband and myself to Salvation through Christ. I thank her for her final request that led me to a place that taught me that being a Christian doesn't mean perfection, it just means forgiven. I thank her for her final request that makes me want to be a better person, mother, wife, sister, and friend. I thank her for her final request that makes me look at the Nativity in a way a never did before.
At this time of year when so many are grieving the loss of loved ones, I say, I get it. But equally I say, don't let their death and ultimately their life, be marked by sadness. Find the one thing that gave you the most joy from that person and hold tight to it. Learn from it and grow from it. The best memorial you can give a loved is joy in your life and the joy you bring to others. Shed some tears if you must, but only for a little while and then remember to smile.
Christmas morning when it is still quiet, I will sit and think of my Mommy and my Daddy and my tears will flow, but then I will smile as I think that on that day, just as the wise men visited the stable in Bethlehem, my parents will be visiting the manager of the King in person. Their voices raised in glorious song to the Christ Child and my heart will burst with joy as I know I will be there with them one day. I pray that you find that joy too!
I pray that you have a joyous Christmas and a Blessed New Year!
Until next time, I thanking Willa Mae Barlow, my Mom for her final request!
God Bless,
Cat
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Friday, December 14, 2012
A Time for Change
I had all intentions of writing a jingle bells, Santa Claus is coming, deck the halls, Merry Christmas kind of blog before Christmas arrived, but circumstances have me being led by the Spirit to write about something else. For some, it sound repetitive of some of the other blogs I've written, but obviously, I need to say it again. Firstly, I have to clarify something. I registered to write this blog as a "Religious" blog; offering inspiration and hoping to encourage someone. After some of my postings I have received some negative comments that suggest this kind of writing does not belong on the Patch or anywhere else. While I appreciate everyone who reads my blog, I will tell you now that I am a Christian and my writings will reflect that; I hope you will continue to read but if you don't want to hear about God or the positive ways we can selflessly serve others, then I respectfully ask that you skip over my blog. I hope you will continue to read, because you never know when I might say something you like! For everyone else who follows me, keep on reading.
As, I am sure most of the rest of the world is, I am heartbroken over the tragic shooting in Connecticut today. The lives of innocent children and adults taken for no reason is completely unexplainable. I tried to make sense of it and I even questioned God as to why this had to happen, but I was at a loss. Listening to the children who were interviewed about what they witnessed, reminded me of a conversation my husband and I had with our two grandchildren just Wednesday evening. My granddaughter, who is 9 years old, told us she has been scared. "Of what?" we asked and she preceded to tell us that kids at school had been talking about the end of the world coming on December 21st. We explained to her that the only one who truly knows when the world will end is God and at that point our grandson who is 6, chimed in. "And Jesus is always with us so you don't have to be scared, and God is Jesus' son." A little mixed up but his point was right on.
I didn't think about that exchange again until today and my heart broke even more. What kind of world are we living in, when the youngest of children have to be afraid of life. Think about it; these children who were witnesses to the savage rampage that occurred at their school today will never go to school again without some kind of fear of that happening again. Most likely any child that hears this news will also be afraid. Gone are the days when the biggest fear of going to school was not being ready to take a test or not being asked to be on the team; now children will be suspicious of everyone and will jump at every noise. Parents will question the security of their child's school and for those who were personally involved, they will struggle with the very idea of letting them out of their sight.
Evil events such as today's, will forever change the way children and adults view the world; at least for a little while. As with any tragic event, 9/11, Columbine, Virginia Tech, and the Oregon mall shooting for example, the collective country and its leaders, boldly proclaim that we PRAY for all those involved and for our country. Prayer vigils are held around the country and families will hold on to and love each other a little stronger, for a little while. Then as quickly as horror struck our lives, we will go back to the way things were. Of course, we never totally forget such events, but inevitably we revert back to the old way of life. Instead of praying for our country and its leaders, we go back to bashing the leadership and their decisions; instead of hugging our children tightly, we become short with them when we are rushed; instead of praying for God's intervention in society, we just accept that evil exists.
We are given an opportunity to turn every tragedy into a victory. We can take moments like these to explain to our children that unfortunately bad things happen to good people but that God is supreme and if we center him in our lives he is our protector both here on earth and in heaven. Perhaps we can use moments like these to remind us of our responsibility to raise our children to respect life; teaching them that no life, no matter how small, is insignificant. Moments like these can be used to remind us to treat each other with love and respect, regardless of race or class, age or gender and we can fight to bring God back to a society that has turned to self-reliance and feel good tactics, turning its back on morality, self-control and self-respect.
I know many of you are probably thinking that I am living in this snow globe wonderland but I am a realist. I know that change doesn't happen over night. Our society didn't warp from the "Leave it to Beaver" days to "CSI" overnight. It has been years of moral erosion, selfishness, and quite frankly a lack of empathy for our neighbors. No doubt, a change for the better is going to take years, but it must start sometime and that time might as well be now; each person, myself included, doing self reflection of how we live our lives, how we treat others, raise our children and yes, where we put our faith.
I am speaking from experience. I haven't always been a follower of Christ. I was a believer, but in anger chose to turn my back on God and live life the way I wanted. I began drinking alcohol and using drugs at age 14. I had no moral compass at all; if it made me happy, I did it. I went about my life, trampling on anyone who got in my way and not caring who got hurt in the process. I had no time for other people, unless it was for my benefit. I was hateful towards the very people who loved me the most and I thought my life was great. I couldn't have been so wrong. No the change in me didn't come overnight. It took many years and the love of my family, despite myself, but when I finally realized that life my way wasn't working, I sought the One who wrote the instruction manual for life. The more I let God into my life and the more I trusted His Word, the better I became as a person and the more I started to care about others. I'm not perfect by any means but I'm a whole lot better than I was. My happiness is no longer the most important thing to me, yet focusing on the happiness of others has made me happier than I ever was. God did that for me and He can do that for you or anyone else who asks Him.
With Christmas just a little over a week away, we will celebrate the birth of the Savior. Jesus was born with one purpose, to die to save us from the destruction of sin. His life on this earth was not spent hanging out with the Godly, but dining and talking with the worst of the worst, loving them and making them want to change for the better, one person at a time. Luke 19:10 says, "For the Son of Man came to seek and save the lost." If you haven't made the choice to let God direct your life, give yourself the best Christmas present ever and give God a try. It will change the way you live, the way you raise your children, the way you treat others, and you might just find your life happier than its ever been. Change happens one person at a time and now is that time.
As we weep for those lost today and for other senseless losses, I know the Savior weeps with us as He waits patiently for us to cry out to Him to save this rotting world. I will be praying without ceasing that one day this world will be peaceful and that all will come to know Him. I will be praying for the families who have been visited by evil such as this that they will come to know the peace of God. And I will be praying that the change that can only comes from personally knowing the Savior will take effect in all who are missing it.
I wish you all a very Blessed Christmas Season! Remember to hug your children a little tighter and a little longer; tell your family you love them; don't let the sun set on your anger; extend your hand to a neighbor and pray, not just for a little while, but always.
Until next time,
God Bless,
Cat
As, I am sure most of the rest of the world is, I am heartbroken over the tragic shooting in Connecticut today. The lives of innocent children and adults taken for no reason is completely unexplainable. I tried to make sense of it and I even questioned God as to why this had to happen, but I was at a loss. Listening to the children who were interviewed about what they witnessed, reminded me of a conversation my husband and I had with our two grandchildren just Wednesday evening. My granddaughter, who is 9 years old, told us she has been scared. "Of what?" we asked and she preceded to tell us that kids at school had been talking about the end of the world coming on December 21st. We explained to her that the only one who truly knows when the world will end is God and at that point our grandson who is 6, chimed in. "And Jesus is always with us so you don't have to be scared, and God is Jesus' son." A little mixed up but his point was right on.
I didn't think about that exchange again until today and my heart broke even more. What kind of world are we living in, when the youngest of children have to be afraid of life. Think about it; these children who were witnesses to the savage rampage that occurred at their school today will never go to school again without some kind of fear of that happening again. Most likely any child that hears this news will also be afraid. Gone are the days when the biggest fear of going to school was not being ready to take a test or not being asked to be on the team; now children will be suspicious of everyone and will jump at every noise. Parents will question the security of their child's school and for those who were personally involved, they will struggle with the very idea of letting them out of their sight.
Evil events such as today's, will forever change the way children and adults view the world; at least for a little while. As with any tragic event, 9/11, Columbine, Virginia Tech, and the Oregon mall shooting for example, the collective country and its leaders, boldly proclaim that we PRAY for all those involved and for our country. Prayer vigils are held around the country and families will hold on to and love each other a little stronger, for a little while. Then as quickly as horror struck our lives, we will go back to the way things were. Of course, we never totally forget such events, but inevitably we revert back to the old way of life. Instead of praying for our country and its leaders, we go back to bashing the leadership and their decisions; instead of hugging our children tightly, we become short with them when we are rushed; instead of praying for God's intervention in society, we just accept that evil exists.
We are given an opportunity to turn every tragedy into a victory. We can take moments like these to explain to our children that unfortunately bad things happen to good people but that God is supreme and if we center him in our lives he is our protector both here on earth and in heaven. Perhaps we can use moments like these to remind us of our responsibility to raise our children to respect life; teaching them that no life, no matter how small, is insignificant. Moments like these can be used to remind us to treat each other with love and respect, regardless of race or class, age or gender and we can fight to bring God back to a society that has turned to self-reliance and feel good tactics, turning its back on morality, self-control and self-respect.
I know many of you are probably thinking that I am living in this snow globe wonderland but I am a realist. I know that change doesn't happen over night. Our society didn't warp from the "Leave it to Beaver" days to "CSI" overnight. It has been years of moral erosion, selfishness, and quite frankly a lack of empathy for our neighbors. No doubt, a change for the better is going to take years, but it must start sometime and that time might as well be now; each person, myself included, doing self reflection of how we live our lives, how we treat others, raise our children and yes, where we put our faith.
I am speaking from experience. I haven't always been a follower of Christ. I was a believer, but in anger chose to turn my back on God and live life the way I wanted. I began drinking alcohol and using drugs at age 14. I had no moral compass at all; if it made me happy, I did it. I went about my life, trampling on anyone who got in my way and not caring who got hurt in the process. I had no time for other people, unless it was for my benefit. I was hateful towards the very people who loved me the most and I thought my life was great. I couldn't have been so wrong. No the change in me didn't come overnight. It took many years and the love of my family, despite myself, but when I finally realized that life my way wasn't working, I sought the One who wrote the instruction manual for life. The more I let God into my life and the more I trusted His Word, the better I became as a person and the more I started to care about others. I'm not perfect by any means but I'm a whole lot better than I was. My happiness is no longer the most important thing to me, yet focusing on the happiness of others has made me happier than I ever was. God did that for me and He can do that for you or anyone else who asks Him.
With Christmas just a little over a week away, we will celebrate the birth of the Savior. Jesus was born with one purpose, to die to save us from the destruction of sin. His life on this earth was not spent hanging out with the Godly, but dining and talking with the worst of the worst, loving them and making them want to change for the better, one person at a time. Luke 19:10 says, "For the Son of Man came to seek and save the lost." If you haven't made the choice to let God direct your life, give yourself the best Christmas present ever and give God a try. It will change the way you live, the way you raise your children, the way you treat others, and you might just find your life happier than its ever been. Change happens one person at a time and now is that time.
As we weep for those lost today and for other senseless losses, I know the Savior weeps with us as He waits patiently for us to cry out to Him to save this rotting world. I will be praying without ceasing that one day this world will be peaceful and that all will come to know Him. I will be praying for the families who have been visited by evil such as this that they will come to know the peace of God. And I will be praying that the change that can only comes from personally knowing the Savior will take effect in all who are missing it.
I wish you all a very Blessed Christmas Season! Remember to hug your children a little tighter and a little longer; tell your family you love them; don't let the sun set on your anger; extend your hand to a neighbor and pray, not just for a little while, but always.
Until next time,
God Bless,
Cat
Thursday, November 8, 2012
United We Stand...
The election has ended and the votes have been counted. Love it or hate it, President Obama has been relected. And now, it is time to move on. Grumbling and growling about your choice not winning or as someone put it today, having a "nanny nanny boo boo" attitude because your choice won, only serves to further divide an already severely fractured country. "United we stand, divided we fall", isn't how the saying goes? So, while we may agree or disagree on the results of the election, we need to stand united, because I for one, don't want to fall.
The fact remains that there needs to be a change and I believe my friends, that change must start with we, the people. It the wake of the devastating destruction caused by Hurricane Sandy, many have stepped forward to donate and support the victims of this tragedy. Within the first day, musicians banded together to do a benefit concert. Churches have opened their doors for donations of food, clothing, water, and basic necessities, then caravaned deliveries to the hardest hit places in New York and New Jersey. Here in Maryland, the day after the storm left its footprint, our church put together a group willing to go out into the community and help with debris cleanup. This appears to be what we as Americans and Christians do in the wake of tragedy at home or abroad. These devastating incidents as well as others such as 9/11 have people reaching deep and wide to help the victims.
But why does it take a tragedy the magnitude of a hurricane, earthquake or terrorist plot to get people interested in helping? All one needs to do is look around their communities, on the street corners and in our schools to see tragedy. These terrible economic times have wreaked havoc on so many people. A vicious cycle ensues, losing a job equals inability to pay your bills, by grocercies, pay your rent or mortage and thus lands many into the world of the forgotten--the homeless.
My son, RC, met a man and his wife on the Wednesday after the storm while standing in a parking lot. He said as the couple approached they were smiling while pulling a fold up grocery cart behind them. Immediately, RC started patting his jeans for any cash or change he had, but he was empty. He looked at the couple, smiled and said, "How are you today?" The man stuck out his hand and shaking my sons, said, "We're fine. How are you?" Then the man asked, "How'd you make out in the hurricane?" My son explained that he had faired well with no power loss or damage and then almost embarrassed to ask, he asked the couple, "How bout you?" The man shook his head and still smiling said, "We survived in a tent. We're homeless so we didn't have much to lose but we did lose the tent." My son, not knowing exactly how to reply said, "I'm so sorry. I wish I could help you but I don't have any cash on me." The reply the man gave, brought tears to RC's eyes. "Don't be sorry. I'm not looking for pity; pity doesn't solve anything. We owned a home in Joppatowne; I lost my job and unemployment couldn't cut it. I've never had a drink of alcohol or used a drug in my life. The only thing I can say I am guilty of is wanting the American dream. All I can tell you, young man, is appreciate everything you have; never take it for granted because it can be here one day and gone the next." TRAGEDY...
RC relayed this story to me with tears still in his eyes. He said what the man said to him would impact him for the rest of his life. While he, RC, was feeling bad for not being able to help the couple with money, the man just wanted to inspire him. RC admitted that he prejudged the couple, automatically assuming they were panhandling and most likely homeless because of some addiction. He couldn't have been more wrong. Tragedy doesn't discriminate and it could hit anyone of us at anytime.
The politicians will take care of politics whether we agree with them or not, but as the people of the great country, we have a responsibility to each other. The president can't dictate who or how we love one another. So lets control the things we still have power over, our love and generosity.
Matthew 25:34-40 says, Then the King will say, "Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in. I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me."
Then the righteous will answer him, "Lord when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?"
The King will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
So how do we do this? The old saying goes, What's the best way to eat an Elephant? ONE BITE AT A TIME! So that's how we do it, one bite at a time. Every community has a food pantry and while there are drives to fill the pantries during Thanksgiving, people need to eat every day, not just on a holiday. Homeless shelters, need blankets, pillows, and funds to keep running. As you pass by a person standing on the corner with a sign, don't prejudge them, you don't know their story; buy them a meal or give them a donation. What they do with the money is on them, not you.
Put yourself in the shoes of someone who is hungry and not sure where their next meal will come from. Walk out into the cold wind without a coat and imagine living like that throughout the winter. And when you crawl into your nice warm bed, imagine your are lying on the cold hard ground. One bite at a time, is all it takes to eat the elephant of poverty in our community.
I've included some links to local outreach programs in our community. Please take the time to visit them and see how you can help. Remember...UNITED WE STAND...DIVIDED WE FALL.
Until next time, I'm standing!
God Bless,
Cat
http://www.extremefamilyoutreach.com/
http://www.catholiccharities-md.org/annas-house/
http://mountainchristian.org/tabithashouse
http://blessingsinabackpack.org/
http://mountainchristian.org/backpack
http://www.harfordfamilyhouse.org/
Check with your local churches as well! Let's get chewing!!
The fact remains that there needs to be a change and I believe my friends, that change must start with we, the people. It the wake of the devastating destruction caused by Hurricane Sandy, many have stepped forward to donate and support the victims of this tragedy. Within the first day, musicians banded together to do a benefit concert. Churches have opened their doors for donations of food, clothing, water, and basic necessities, then caravaned deliveries to the hardest hit places in New York and New Jersey. Here in Maryland, the day after the storm left its footprint, our church put together a group willing to go out into the community and help with debris cleanup. This appears to be what we as Americans and Christians do in the wake of tragedy at home or abroad. These devastating incidents as well as others such as 9/11 have people reaching deep and wide to help the victims.
But why does it take a tragedy the magnitude of a hurricane, earthquake or terrorist plot to get people interested in helping? All one needs to do is look around their communities, on the street corners and in our schools to see tragedy. These terrible economic times have wreaked havoc on so many people. A vicious cycle ensues, losing a job equals inability to pay your bills, by grocercies, pay your rent or mortage and thus lands many into the world of the forgotten--the homeless.
My son, RC, met a man and his wife on the Wednesday after the storm while standing in a parking lot. He said as the couple approached they were smiling while pulling a fold up grocery cart behind them. Immediately, RC started patting his jeans for any cash or change he had, but he was empty. He looked at the couple, smiled and said, "How are you today?" The man stuck out his hand and shaking my sons, said, "We're fine. How are you?" Then the man asked, "How'd you make out in the hurricane?" My son explained that he had faired well with no power loss or damage and then almost embarrassed to ask, he asked the couple, "How bout you?" The man shook his head and still smiling said, "We survived in a tent. We're homeless so we didn't have much to lose but we did lose the tent." My son, not knowing exactly how to reply said, "I'm so sorry. I wish I could help you but I don't have any cash on me." The reply the man gave, brought tears to RC's eyes. "Don't be sorry. I'm not looking for pity; pity doesn't solve anything. We owned a home in Joppatowne; I lost my job and unemployment couldn't cut it. I've never had a drink of alcohol or used a drug in my life. The only thing I can say I am guilty of is wanting the American dream. All I can tell you, young man, is appreciate everything you have; never take it for granted because it can be here one day and gone the next." TRAGEDY...
RC relayed this story to me with tears still in his eyes. He said what the man said to him would impact him for the rest of his life. While he, RC, was feeling bad for not being able to help the couple with money, the man just wanted to inspire him. RC admitted that he prejudged the couple, automatically assuming they were panhandling and most likely homeless because of some addiction. He couldn't have been more wrong. Tragedy doesn't discriminate and it could hit anyone of us at anytime.
The politicians will take care of politics whether we agree with them or not, but as the people of the great country, we have a responsibility to each other. The president can't dictate who or how we love one another. So lets control the things we still have power over, our love and generosity.
Matthew 25:34-40 says, Then the King will say, "Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in. I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me."
Then the righteous will answer him, "Lord when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?"
The King will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
So how do we do this? The old saying goes, What's the best way to eat an Elephant? ONE BITE AT A TIME! So that's how we do it, one bite at a time. Every community has a food pantry and while there are drives to fill the pantries during Thanksgiving, people need to eat every day, not just on a holiday. Homeless shelters, need blankets, pillows, and funds to keep running. As you pass by a person standing on the corner with a sign, don't prejudge them, you don't know their story; buy them a meal or give them a donation. What they do with the money is on them, not you.
Put yourself in the shoes of someone who is hungry and not sure where their next meal will come from. Walk out into the cold wind without a coat and imagine living like that throughout the winter. And when you crawl into your nice warm bed, imagine your are lying on the cold hard ground. One bite at a time, is all it takes to eat the elephant of poverty in our community.
I've included some links to local outreach programs in our community. Please take the time to visit them and see how you can help. Remember...UNITED WE STAND...DIVIDED WE FALL.
Until next time, I'm standing!
God Bless,
Cat
http://www.extremefamilyoutreach.com/
http://www.catholiccharities-md.org/annas-house/
http://mountainchristian.org/tabithashouse
http://blessingsinabackpack.org/
http://mountainchristian.org/backpack
http://www.harfordfamilyhouse.org/
Check with your local churches as well! Let's get chewing!!
Friday, September 28, 2012
Things Are Getting Weird!
Are you ready for some football?!!!! For many, myself included, we can't wait to hear those words, marking the beginning of football season! We break out the jerseys of our favorite players; plan the tailgate menu for our couches or trunks; schedule activities around game time and we power up the apps on our phones to tweet or facebook our comments on each play or bad call. Just another "normal" season, or is it? The fact is there is nothing "normal" about this season at all. You don't have to be a football fan to know that, you just need to turn on the news and here all the complaining about the replacement referees and what call they missed or messed up or how their mistake cost one team a win and assured another a victory. Fans are raging about the injustices that are occurring and they are taking to the airways and social networking forums to make their grievances heard. Because hey, this is football season and there is a Super Bowl on the line! That's important! Believe me, I get it. I do my fair share of moaning and groaning as I root my Ravens on and watch the ridiculously obvious missed calls. But the more I hear and the more I think about it, the more I have to wonder how misguided all our "righteous indignation" is.
These replacement refs won't be here forever, in fact, the "real" refs will probably be back by the time I finish and post this blog. The decisions they made or didn't make won't effect our lives in any other way than our bragging rights. As I read some of the social media posts and listened to the various announcers complaining about the incompetence of the refs, their anger was almost palatable. I had to wonder what if that anger was directed toward the things that affect our lives, others lives, and the world in general. I couldn't help but think that if I, we, took just a fraction of the energy we put into bashing the NFL and the refs, and put it towards fighting a social injustice or simply doing something worthwhile to better someone else's life, what kind of difference could be made.
Our church is currently doing a sermon series that is entitled "Cannonball Weird". It is a series that calls us to step out of the "norm" and become weird. We are encouraged not to conform to what the world considers normal and instead conform to weird ways of Jesus. Jesus did everything that was against the norm. He calls us to love our enemies; turn the other cheek; sell everything and follow him. Jesus didn't surround himself with the pure of heart and the noblest of men. He hung out with tax collectors, thieves, prostitutes, fishermen and widows. He looked beyond social status and didn't care what others thought about his choices in friends. He chose to love everyone, regardless of what was normal. Pretty weird huh?
Well, I thought I would challenge all my readers to get weird or in some cases, weirder! Today's society has dictated a pace that far too many of us find hard to keep up with. Family dinners are reduced to drive-thru meals on the way to sports functions; our hurried schedules have us walking with our eyes straight ahead ignoring those we pass; hectic work schedules have us spending less quality time with our children and loved ones and our desire to have more of everything has us forgetting to appreciate what we already have.
So...here are some ideas to inspire you to be weird:
1. Set aside some time this week to have a sit down at the kitchen table dinner with your family. Talk about anything; laugh about everything and remind each other how much you love them.
2. Make a point to smile and speak to everyone you pass. Offer words of encouragement to the girl at the checkout counter or say hello to the person standing behind in you line.
3. Say thank you to a police officer, fireman, or service man or woman for their dedication and service. Maybe buy them a coffee or bottle of water.
4. Carve out some time to volunteer at a Boys and Girls club helping children with homework or visit a senior center to chat with a someone who may be lonely.
5. Encourage your children to befriend someone who is sitting alone on the playground or in the cafeteria.
6. Think of something that you feel passionate about: homelessness, child abuse, bullying, or senseless violence, and discover how you can help and maybe even do it as a family. Volunteer at a homeless shelter or organize a food drive for a food pantry.
7. Take time for you. Get up a little early and enjoy the sunrise as you sip your coffee; take a walk in a park and breathe in the beauty that surrounds you; study a flower and wonder at its beauty.
8. Read a book to your child, play a game or watch a family movie together. Popcorn and all!
9. Do something nice to surprise someone and be completely anonymous.
10. Be patient when patience is thin; slow to anger; quick to love and kind with your words.
If we can expend such energy on negative things, we can afford to expend some energy on the positive. The old saying goes, What's the best way to eat an elephant? One bite at a time! Change won't happen overnight but if we take one bite at a time, a difference can and will be made. It is a know fact that it takes less energy to be happy than angry and less muscles to smile than frown. Give it a try! Get Weird!!!
I would love for you to share with me what you did to be weird and what kind of difference it made, either in the way you felt or someone else felt. Oh and by the way, I was right the real refs are back and football is back to "normal". Now let's get weirded out for a good reason!
Until next time, I working on becoming weirder!!
God Bless,
Cat
These replacement refs won't be here forever, in fact, the "real" refs will probably be back by the time I finish and post this blog. The decisions they made or didn't make won't effect our lives in any other way than our bragging rights. As I read some of the social media posts and listened to the various announcers complaining about the incompetence of the refs, their anger was almost palatable. I had to wonder what if that anger was directed toward the things that affect our lives, others lives, and the world in general. I couldn't help but think that if I, we, took just a fraction of the energy we put into bashing the NFL and the refs, and put it towards fighting a social injustice or simply doing something worthwhile to better someone else's life, what kind of difference could be made.
Our church is currently doing a sermon series that is entitled "Cannonball Weird". It is a series that calls us to step out of the "norm" and become weird. We are encouraged not to conform to what the world considers normal and instead conform to weird ways of Jesus. Jesus did everything that was against the norm. He calls us to love our enemies; turn the other cheek; sell everything and follow him. Jesus didn't surround himself with the pure of heart and the noblest of men. He hung out with tax collectors, thieves, prostitutes, fishermen and widows. He looked beyond social status and didn't care what others thought about his choices in friends. He chose to love everyone, regardless of what was normal. Pretty weird huh?
Well, I thought I would challenge all my readers to get weird or in some cases, weirder! Today's society has dictated a pace that far too many of us find hard to keep up with. Family dinners are reduced to drive-thru meals on the way to sports functions; our hurried schedules have us walking with our eyes straight ahead ignoring those we pass; hectic work schedules have us spending less quality time with our children and loved ones and our desire to have more of everything has us forgetting to appreciate what we already have.
So...here are some ideas to inspire you to be weird:
1. Set aside some time this week to have a sit down at the kitchen table dinner with your family. Talk about anything; laugh about everything and remind each other how much you love them.
2. Make a point to smile and speak to everyone you pass. Offer words of encouragement to the girl at the checkout counter or say hello to the person standing behind in you line.
3. Say thank you to a police officer, fireman, or service man or woman for their dedication and service. Maybe buy them a coffee or bottle of water.
4. Carve out some time to volunteer at a Boys and Girls club helping children with homework or visit a senior center to chat with a someone who may be lonely.
5. Encourage your children to befriend someone who is sitting alone on the playground or in the cafeteria.
6. Think of something that you feel passionate about: homelessness, child abuse, bullying, or senseless violence, and discover how you can help and maybe even do it as a family. Volunteer at a homeless shelter or organize a food drive for a food pantry.
7. Take time for you. Get up a little early and enjoy the sunrise as you sip your coffee; take a walk in a park and breathe in the beauty that surrounds you; study a flower and wonder at its beauty.
8. Read a book to your child, play a game or watch a family movie together. Popcorn and all!
9. Do something nice to surprise someone and be completely anonymous.
10. Be patient when patience is thin; slow to anger; quick to love and kind with your words.
If we can expend such energy on negative things, we can afford to expend some energy on the positive. The old saying goes, What's the best way to eat an elephant? One bite at a time! Change won't happen overnight but if we take one bite at a time, a difference can and will be made. It is a know fact that it takes less energy to be happy than angry and less muscles to smile than frown. Give it a try! Get Weird!!!
I would love for you to share with me what you did to be weird and what kind of difference it made, either in the way you felt or someone else felt. Oh and by the way, I was right the real refs are back and football is back to "normal". Now let's get weirded out for a good reason!
Until next time, I working on becoming weirder!!
God Bless,
Cat
Saturday, September 22, 2012
"No Greater Love..."
As the sun sets on another week, a community mourns the loss of yet another Harford County officer. Two, devoted police officers, lost in the line of duty in the span of one week. Harford County Sheriff L. Jesse Bane made a poignant statement during Sgt. Loughran's funeral, "There are critics who believe that to be a hero there has to be drama; that one should die in a gun battle with an assailant or burn in a building trying to rescue a child." He further said, that while there was not this kind of drama in the sergeant's death, he was nevertheless a hero and his passing holds purpose. In my opinion, no truer statement has ever been spoken and this Sergeant's passing hit very close to home.
It was a warm spring day on April 23, 1978 when my young life would be changed forever. My father, Robert Barlow, was a Sergeant with the Baltimore City Police Department. He had devoted 19 years to the department, serving in the crime lab and the tactical unit. On this particular day, he had served his tour of duty at Memorial Stadium for the Orioles vs. Yankees game. It was unusually hot for April and during his assignment several people had suffered heat strokes and heat exhaustion. In the customary attitude of our public servants, he did just that, he served to help assist and carry these patients to first aide. At the end of his shift, while finalizing his paperwork for the squad, an officer under his command, poked his head into his office and asked, "Sarge, you okay?" My Dad looked up and said, "Yeah, I'm fine; just tired. I'm getting too old for this," and he chuckled.
When Daddy got home, he greeted me as I sat on the front porch steps. He rubbed my head and asked how his girl was then made his way into the house. By the time I entered the house, he had changed out of his uniform and sat on the living room sofa reading the newspaper. My Mom was in the kitchen warming his dinner and my friend and I stood and talked with her. During our conversation, my Dad called out my name, but instead of answering him, I continued my conversation with my Mom. Only a few moments later, I turned to go back outside and my life would never be the same. There on the sofa, slumped over and grasping his chest, was my Dad. I screamed, "Daddy!" and I heard the spoon hit the floor in the kitchen. My Mom rushed to Daddy's side and as she struggled to straighten her husband on the couch, in her calmest voice, she instructed me to get help.
From a neighbors house, I watched as rescue vehicles arrived; red and white lights flashing and engines roaring. Paramedics grabbed equipment and rushed through my front door. I stared out the window of the screen door, waiting for my Dad to come out on the porch and wave me home as the flashing lights burned my tear filled eyes. But he didn't. Instead, I watched as he was carried into the waiting ambulance and whisked away. I listened as the wail of the sirens were replaced by the pounding of my heart in my head.
Hours later, I learned that Daddy had suffered a massive heart attack and at age 42, had died. In a brief few hours, I went from being a carefree twelve year old girl, to a little girl trying to grasp the death of her Daddy and my Mom went from being a wife to a widow.
Watching the funerals of the two officers lost this past week, brought back the memories of my Dad's funeral. I remember seeing people lined up with hands over their hearts and firemen and police officers at every intersection. Through my grief, I remember thinking how proud I felt that they cared enough to honor him in that way. The flag that draped his casket, sits in its place of honor, thirty-four years later, atop my fireplace next to his picture.
Declaring his death as a line of duty incident in 1978 was not an easy task. There was a trial and my mother was forced to relive the events of that day. In that era, even the department had a hard time determining whether the events of the day contributed to the death of my father. Ultimately it was decided by the department that his death was considered line of duty. While the paperwork declared it so, the public didn't understand it. How could a heart attack that occurred after work be considered a line of duty incident?
My Dad didn't die as the result of a gun fight or a high speed chase. He wasn't ambushed by a drug dealer and he wasn't killed by an armed robber. Daddy died because the stresses of the day, the heat, the exertion of carrying ailing citizens to care and nineteen years of serving and protecting the city of Baltimore. Each and every police officer that takes to the streets at the start of their shift, does so without any idea of what those twelve hours will hold. They don't know who is hiding around the corner; what horrific sight they will encounter at a crime scene, or how they will find the words to tell a mother that her child is gone. They will close their eyes to sleep and see the anguished face of the child beaten by a parent; they will kiss their children good night and pray that they will not fall victim to the drug dealers littering the community; and they will kiss their loved ones good bye, unsure they will return home safely. Why? Well ,it certainly isn't for the salary nor the appreciation they receive from others. No, they do it because they chose the noble profession of serving and protecting.
Whether a soldier, a fireman, or a police officer, they don't have a red cape or a giant S on their chests; they don't have comic books about their adventures or lunch boxes with their faces on them and people certainly don't stand in line for hours to have their pictures taken with them or get their autographs. Quite frankly, unless you have needed their assistance, they are in a thankless profession.
I once met a tiny, young woman at a gathering who in conversation told me she was a police officer. I couldn't believe it, so I asked, "What made you want to be a cop?" Her response surprised me. She smiled, shrugged her shoulders and said, "Call me crazy, but I believe that one day the world will be a safer place and if I can play a small part in making that happen, then I will count myself a success." Her answer wasn't because she wanted the authority of a badge or the power of carrying a gun but instead was to make the world safer. A selfless attitude indeed.
Jesus, himself, had this similar attitude. No, He didn't wear a badge or carrying a gun and while His focus was not on putting the bad guys in jail, He walked this earth to teach and inspire people. His desire was for everyone to live in love and peace with each other and with God. Jesus started his shift knowing he would face hostility, the possibility of ambush, and the certainty of death but because of his love for people he was undeterred. Jesus took his final roll call on the cross. His death was in the line of duty while protecting and serving God's people.
Imagine for a moment if you will, what our community would be like if we all took these kind of attitudes: What if every person held themselves accountable for their actions? What if each person was in the habit of protecting and serving one another, instead of fighting and being self-centered? What if instead of bullying we befriended or instead of turning to drugs to cope we could rely on one another for support? What if instead of ignoring the down and out with extended a hand to help them up? What if there was no need for gangs because everyone felt important and empowered? What if all parents trained their children up with respect and love? What if our streets became a place for neighbors to talk and children to play instead of drug territories and gang turf? Sounds like a pretty lofty idea but wouldn't it be great?!
Jesus gave us the great command in John 15:12-13, "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down ones life for another."
When our men and women in blue put on their badges, this is what they are doing. They are willing to sacrifice it all for the safety of another. Whether they die by gunfire or the stresses of the job weakens their hearts, they die a HERO and exemplify the great command. So, until we, the community, can fulfill all the "What ifs", take the time to thank our superheroes in blue, our soldiers in camo, and our firemen in gear. Respect their positions and be grateful for their service. Support their spouses and loved ones who sacrifice as much as they do and say a prayer for the safety of all.
Until next time, I will rest easier knowing that I am being guarded from the heavens by my Dad and the many who have died serving and protecting...
God Bless,
Cat
It was a warm spring day on April 23, 1978 when my young life would be changed forever. My father, Robert Barlow, was a Sergeant with the Baltimore City Police Department. He had devoted 19 years to the department, serving in the crime lab and the tactical unit. On this particular day, he had served his tour of duty at Memorial Stadium for the Orioles vs. Yankees game. It was unusually hot for April and during his assignment several people had suffered heat strokes and heat exhaustion. In the customary attitude of our public servants, he did just that, he served to help assist and carry these patients to first aide. At the end of his shift, while finalizing his paperwork for the squad, an officer under his command, poked his head into his office and asked, "Sarge, you okay?" My Dad looked up and said, "Yeah, I'm fine; just tired. I'm getting too old for this," and he chuckled.
When Daddy got home, he greeted me as I sat on the front porch steps. He rubbed my head and asked how his girl was then made his way into the house. By the time I entered the house, he had changed out of his uniform and sat on the living room sofa reading the newspaper. My Mom was in the kitchen warming his dinner and my friend and I stood and talked with her. During our conversation, my Dad called out my name, but instead of answering him, I continued my conversation with my Mom. Only a few moments later, I turned to go back outside and my life would never be the same. There on the sofa, slumped over and grasping his chest, was my Dad. I screamed, "Daddy!" and I heard the spoon hit the floor in the kitchen. My Mom rushed to Daddy's side and as she struggled to straighten her husband on the couch, in her calmest voice, she instructed me to get help.
From a neighbors house, I watched as rescue vehicles arrived; red and white lights flashing and engines roaring. Paramedics grabbed equipment and rushed through my front door. I stared out the window of the screen door, waiting for my Dad to come out on the porch and wave me home as the flashing lights burned my tear filled eyes. But he didn't. Instead, I watched as he was carried into the waiting ambulance and whisked away. I listened as the wail of the sirens were replaced by the pounding of my heart in my head.
Hours later, I learned that Daddy had suffered a massive heart attack and at age 42, had died. In a brief few hours, I went from being a carefree twelve year old girl, to a little girl trying to grasp the death of her Daddy and my Mom went from being a wife to a widow.
Watching the funerals of the two officers lost this past week, brought back the memories of my Dad's funeral. I remember seeing people lined up with hands over their hearts and firemen and police officers at every intersection. Through my grief, I remember thinking how proud I felt that they cared enough to honor him in that way. The flag that draped his casket, sits in its place of honor, thirty-four years later, atop my fireplace next to his picture.
Declaring his death as a line of duty incident in 1978 was not an easy task. There was a trial and my mother was forced to relive the events of that day. In that era, even the department had a hard time determining whether the events of the day contributed to the death of my father. Ultimately it was decided by the department that his death was considered line of duty. While the paperwork declared it so, the public didn't understand it. How could a heart attack that occurred after work be considered a line of duty incident?
My Dad didn't die as the result of a gun fight or a high speed chase. He wasn't ambushed by a drug dealer and he wasn't killed by an armed robber. Daddy died because the stresses of the day, the heat, the exertion of carrying ailing citizens to care and nineteen years of serving and protecting the city of Baltimore. Each and every police officer that takes to the streets at the start of their shift, does so without any idea of what those twelve hours will hold. They don't know who is hiding around the corner; what horrific sight they will encounter at a crime scene, or how they will find the words to tell a mother that her child is gone. They will close their eyes to sleep and see the anguished face of the child beaten by a parent; they will kiss their children good night and pray that they will not fall victim to the drug dealers littering the community; and they will kiss their loved ones good bye, unsure they will return home safely. Why? Well ,it certainly isn't for the salary nor the appreciation they receive from others. No, they do it because they chose the noble profession of serving and protecting.
Whether a soldier, a fireman, or a police officer, they don't have a red cape or a giant S on their chests; they don't have comic books about their adventures or lunch boxes with their faces on them and people certainly don't stand in line for hours to have their pictures taken with them or get their autographs. Quite frankly, unless you have needed their assistance, they are in a thankless profession.
I once met a tiny, young woman at a gathering who in conversation told me she was a police officer. I couldn't believe it, so I asked, "What made you want to be a cop?" Her response surprised me. She smiled, shrugged her shoulders and said, "Call me crazy, but I believe that one day the world will be a safer place and if I can play a small part in making that happen, then I will count myself a success." Her answer wasn't because she wanted the authority of a badge or the power of carrying a gun but instead was to make the world safer. A selfless attitude indeed.
Jesus, himself, had this similar attitude. No, He didn't wear a badge or carrying a gun and while His focus was not on putting the bad guys in jail, He walked this earth to teach and inspire people. His desire was for everyone to live in love and peace with each other and with God. Jesus started his shift knowing he would face hostility, the possibility of ambush, and the certainty of death but because of his love for people he was undeterred. Jesus took his final roll call on the cross. His death was in the line of duty while protecting and serving God's people.
Imagine for a moment if you will, what our community would be like if we all took these kind of attitudes: What if every person held themselves accountable for their actions? What if each person was in the habit of protecting and serving one another, instead of fighting and being self-centered? What if instead of bullying we befriended or instead of turning to drugs to cope we could rely on one another for support? What if instead of ignoring the down and out with extended a hand to help them up? What if there was no need for gangs because everyone felt important and empowered? What if all parents trained their children up with respect and love? What if our streets became a place for neighbors to talk and children to play instead of drug territories and gang turf? Sounds like a pretty lofty idea but wouldn't it be great?!
Jesus gave us the great command in John 15:12-13, "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down ones life for another."
When our men and women in blue put on their badges, this is what they are doing. They are willing to sacrifice it all for the safety of another. Whether they die by gunfire or the stresses of the job weakens their hearts, they die a HERO and exemplify the great command. So, until we, the community, can fulfill all the "What ifs", take the time to thank our superheroes in blue, our soldiers in camo, and our firemen in gear. Respect their positions and be grateful for their service. Support their spouses and loved ones who sacrifice as much as they do and say a prayer for the safety of all.
Until next time, I will rest easier knowing that I am being guarded from the heavens by my Dad and the many who have died serving and protecting...
God Bless,
Cat
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Cat's Chat: Got Answers?
Cat's Chat: Got Answers?: Okay...well...Since my last post on why bad things happen to good people, I have been faced with that question head on and up close and pers...
Got Answers?
Okay...well...Since my last post on why bad things happen to good people, I have been faced with that question head on and up close and personal! As I write this, I'm typing with one finger. Why? On June 10th, after enjoying a wonderful motorcycle ride with good friends, we returned to their house to cool off in the pool and have dinner. My cell phone rang and I got out of the pool to answer it only to find out that sister was being taken to the hospital. As I turned to tell my husband that we needed to leave, I lost my footing and fell off the deck, landing face first on the concrete patio. My feet never left the deck, so my upper body absorbed all of my weight as I slammed the concrete. I felt my face bounce off the patio and was immediately aware that things were broken in my body and I could not move, well at least I didn't want to.
As my friends and husband rushed to my side, I later learned that my husband expected to find my nose or jaw broken, with lots of blood. However, I have come to recognize that God must have put his hands around my face since I didn't have so much as a scratch. My arms didn't fare so well. My right arm was dislocated and broken in four places and the radial joint in the left arm was fractured in three places. After arriving by ambulance at Upper Chesapeake Hospital, numerous x-rays, and reduction of the dislocation, I was informed by the orthopedic surgeon that the injuries to my arms were too severe to handle there and that I would need to be treated by Shock Trauma surgeons. I left the hospital, both arms casted, and completely helpless.
Upon my return home, my husband and daughter in tow, I was surprised when one of my best friends arrived wearing pajamas and carrying an overnight bag. She was here to stay, and be my hands for the following day. This was the beginning of the many blessings that would be poured out on me and my family.
My initial reaction to my fall was, "Why me God?" But as quick as that thought entered my mind, I knew that God would teach me something through all of this. The first blessing I recognized was right after the fall. I'm sure that shock played a part, but I felt such a complete peace about what was happening. I knew whole heartedly that God was in control and would be in control through the whole situation!! I never shed a tear.
The next blessing I recognized was with my daughter, Amanda. She and I have always had a "good" relationship, but it has always been strained. She and I are so much alike that we tend to butt heads. From the moment she arrived at the hospital, she jumped in with both feet to help me and her Dad, handling all the medical arrangements and helping to dress, feed, bathe, and care for me. I witnessed a level of compassion radiate through her that made me realize her love for me. My sons in the same way have supported and helped without question or frustration in any way they can.
Another example of blessings I have witnessed have been through my friends and church family. My family has received meals prepared for everyday since this has occurred. My friends have put their lives on hold to come and stay with me and watch my grandchildren. Cards of get well blessings have flooded my mail box. They have truly been my hands and the hands and feet of Jesus!!
One of the greatest blessings has been my husband, Chuck. He has exemplified his marriage vows, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health. He has been called upon to assist me in activities no man would find comfortable, yet he has done so without question or frustration. I have always known he loved me, but in all of this I have come to realize just how much.
These are the blessings that have come in this tragedy, but with all blessings there is a lesson to learn. I have been taught several lessons in this. Firstly, Humility. When you are rendered helpless, unable to do for yourself, pride needs to find a place on a shelf. God has taught me through this that it is okay to let others do for you the things you can't do for your self, no matter how embarrassing. Secondly, I've learned to be more patient with myself and with others. And thirdly, I have learned to allow others to serve me. As hard as it is to sit back and allow others to do things for me, I know that we are each called to be the hands and feet of Jesus and it would be selfish of me to prevent them from experiencing the joy of serving.
I've had surgery and my recovery will be long, but I am comforted knowing that I have so many friends and family selflessly giving all they have for me. Satan can try and tell me that I am undeserving of such love, but my God tells me different. So, instead of asking "why?" I'm choosing to look for the blessings and learn from the lessons. And maybe one day when i meet my Savior in Heaven, I'll ask him "Why?".
Until next time, I'm not asking "Why". GODS GOT IT!!!!
God Bless,
CAT
P.S. My sister had pneumonia and is doing much better! I think I win though, as two broken elbows trumps pneumonia!
As my friends and husband rushed to my side, I later learned that my husband expected to find my nose or jaw broken, with lots of blood. However, I have come to recognize that God must have put his hands around my face since I didn't have so much as a scratch. My arms didn't fare so well. My right arm was dislocated and broken in four places and the radial joint in the left arm was fractured in three places. After arriving by ambulance at Upper Chesapeake Hospital, numerous x-rays, and reduction of the dislocation, I was informed by the orthopedic surgeon that the injuries to my arms were too severe to handle there and that I would need to be treated by Shock Trauma surgeons. I left the hospital, both arms casted, and completely helpless.
Upon my return home, my husband and daughter in tow, I was surprised when one of my best friends arrived wearing pajamas and carrying an overnight bag. She was here to stay, and be my hands for the following day. This was the beginning of the many blessings that would be poured out on me and my family.
My initial reaction to my fall was, "Why me God?" But as quick as that thought entered my mind, I knew that God would teach me something through all of this. The first blessing I recognized was right after the fall. I'm sure that shock played a part, but I felt such a complete peace about what was happening. I knew whole heartedly that God was in control and would be in control through the whole situation!! I never shed a tear.
The next blessing I recognized was with my daughter, Amanda. She and I have always had a "good" relationship, but it has always been strained. She and I are so much alike that we tend to butt heads. From the moment she arrived at the hospital, she jumped in with both feet to help me and her Dad, handling all the medical arrangements and helping to dress, feed, bathe, and care for me. I witnessed a level of compassion radiate through her that made me realize her love for me. My sons in the same way have supported and helped without question or frustration in any way they can.
Another example of blessings I have witnessed have been through my friends and church family. My family has received meals prepared for everyday since this has occurred. My friends have put their lives on hold to come and stay with me and watch my grandchildren. Cards of get well blessings have flooded my mail box. They have truly been my hands and the hands and feet of Jesus!!
One of the greatest blessings has been my husband, Chuck. He has exemplified his marriage vows, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health. He has been called upon to assist me in activities no man would find comfortable, yet he has done so without question or frustration. I have always known he loved me, but in all of this I have come to realize just how much.
These are the blessings that have come in this tragedy, but with all blessings there is a lesson to learn. I have been taught several lessons in this. Firstly, Humility. When you are rendered helpless, unable to do for yourself, pride needs to find a place on a shelf. God has taught me through this that it is okay to let others do for you the things you can't do for your self, no matter how embarrassing. Secondly, I've learned to be more patient with myself and with others. And thirdly, I have learned to allow others to serve me. As hard as it is to sit back and allow others to do things for me, I know that we are each called to be the hands and feet of Jesus and it would be selfish of me to prevent them from experiencing the joy of serving.
I've had surgery and my recovery will be long, but I am comforted knowing that I have so many friends and family selflessly giving all they have for me. Satan can try and tell me that I am undeserving of such love, but my God tells me different. So, instead of asking "why?" I'm choosing to look for the blessings and learn from the lessons. And maybe one day when i meet my Savior in Heaven, I'll ask him "Why?".
Until next time, I'm not asking "Why". GODS GOT IT!!!!
God Bless,
CAT
P.S. My sister had pneumonia and is doing much better! I think I win though, as two broken elbows trumps pneumonia!
Friday, June 8, 2012
Got Questions?
After posting a comment on a recent article on the Belair Patch, regarding a serious car accident, I was asked the question that many who don't understand the power of God ask. Why do bad things happen to good people? It took me some time to respond to that question, because in all honesty, that has to be one of the hardest questions to answer; one of the hardest things to understand. After a quick thought, I responded with a simple "I don't know why bad things happen to good people but I know that God loves all." It was a honest answer, but after much reflection, I realized the answer I gave was one of those answers that are wrapped up nice and neat in a pretty little box. My answer was generic.
I have prayed about and pondered that question since that day, asking God to reveal the response I should have given. I've come to expect that the answers to my prayers are not always delivered by FedEx, nor are they always tied up in a neat little package like my answer was and the answer to this prayer was no different. In the days since I began meditating on this question, I have heard of so many tragic events, where terrible things have happened to good people. Young people taking their own lives, children being abused, babies being stricken by cancer, car and motorcycle accidents taking lives or changing lives drastically and people losing loved ones to drugs or illness. Everywhere I turned, tragedy after tragedy.
I started to reflect on my life and the lives of people that I am close to and the bad things that have happened in our lives. I thought back to the death of my father, just 42 years old; a police officer and an incredible husband, father and friend. The day of his death, he had worked to save the lives of several people stricken with heat exhaustion, only to die that very night of a massive heart attack. I thought of my mother and mother-in-law, both wonderful Christian women, mothers, grandmothers, and friends, who both lost terrible battles with cancer. Then there was our dear Christian brother, Ed Rogers, who was killed last July in a motorcycle accident. I've have friends who have dedicated their lives to Christ and still have been dealt the blows of drug addiction, job losses, serious illnesses and deaths of loved ones. Bad things happening to good people.
So after much reflection, meditation and prayer this is what I have come to realize. God, is eternal, infinite, omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent and why should I, a human being and not all these things, be able to fully understand God's ways? The book of Job in the Old Testament of the Bible is a great example of this. Job, was a devout, faithful, servant of God, and because of his faithfulness, God had blessed Job immeasurably. One day, Satan came to God and challenged Him, telling God that if all of his blessings, his health, his family, his home, and his livelihood were taken away, surely Job would curse God and turn away. God agreed to Satan's test and allowed him (Satan) to take away all of Job's blessings short of his life and with great joy Satan did. But instead of trying to understand why God allowed these things to happen to him, Job, knowing God is good, remained faithful to Him. In Job 1:21, Job says, "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." In his suffering Job continued to hope in the Lord. Job 13:15 "Though he slay me, yet I will hope in him." Because of his faithfulness, (Job 42:10) God restored his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before.
When I really thought about the question, Why do bad things happen to good people? I was struck by one thing in particular, "good people". The fact is that there are no "good" people on this earth. We are all tainted by sin. Even the most devout Christians, the nicest, kindest, most giving people you have ever known are tainted by sin. Everyday that we are alive on this earth is only by the grace and mercy of God. So I guess the real question should be, "Why do good things happen to bad people?"
The answer to this question is made clear in Romans 5: 8, "God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." God loves us so much that He paid the penalty of our sin with His own death, assuring that those who have accepted Jesus Christ as Savior,will have eternal life in heaven. Not what we deserve by any means but what He gives to those who trust the Lord. Plain and simple, despite the evil, sinful nature of our human lives, God still loves us. John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
In a nut shell, none of us deserve the blessings we have and unfortunately bad things do happen to people who seem undeserving of them. But one thing is certain, God will use every situation for good. You may not see it in the moment, but one day it will be revealed to you. Jeremiah 29:11-12 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."
Things are gonna happen to us that we don't understand, but we are secure in the promise of Jesus. In John 16:33, Jesus tells us this, "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Jesus doesn't candy coat it, he says there will be trouble, but he gives us the assurance of victory in him!!
So...when life delivers that swift kick in the gut, don't double over in pain, but stand upright in the knowledge that God's got it!!
Until next time, I'm done asking why!
God Bless,
Cat
I have prayed about and pondered that question since that day, asking God to reveal the response I should have given. I've come to expect that the answers to my prayers are not always delivered by FedEx, nor are they always tied up in a neat little package like my answer was and the answer to this prayer was no different. In the days since I began meditating on this question, I have heard of so many tragic events, where terrible things have happened to good people. Young people taking their own lives, children being abused, babies being stricken by cancer, car and motorcycle accidents taking lives or changing lives drastically and people losing loved ones to drugs or illness. Everywhere I turned, tragedy after tragedy.
I started to reflect on my life and the lives of people that I am close to and the bad things that have happened in our lives. I thought back to the death of my father, just 42 years old; a police officer and an incredible husband, father and friend. The day of his death, he had worked to save the lives of several people stricken with heat exhaustion, only to die that very night of a massive heart attack. I thought of my mother and mother-in-law, both wonderful Christian women, mothers, grandmothers, and friends, who both lost terrible battles with cancer. Then there was our dear Christian brother, Ed Rogers, who was killed last July in a motorcycle accident. I've have friends who have dedicated their lives to Christ and still have been dealt the blows of drug addiction, job losses, serious illnesses and deaths of loved ones. Bad things happening to good people.
So after much reflection, meditation and prayer this is what I have come to realize. God, is eternal, infinite, omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent and why should I, a human being and not all these things, be able to fully understand God's ways? The book of Job in the Old Testament of the Bible is a great example of this. Job, was a devout, faithful, servant of God, and because of his faithfulness, God had blessed Job immeasurably. One day, Satan came to God and challenged Him, telling God that if all of his blessings, his health, his family, his home, and his livelihood were taken away, surely Job would curse God and turn away. God agreed to Satan's test and allowed him (Satan) to take away all of Job's blessings short of his life and with great joy Satan did. But instead of trying to understand why God allowed these things to happen to him, Job, knowing God is good, remained faithful to Him. In Job 1:21, Job says, "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." In his suffering Job continued to hope in the Lord. Job 13:15 "Though he slay me, yet I will hope in him." Because of his faithfulness, (Job 42:10) God restored his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before.
When I really thought about the question, Why do bad things happen to good people? I was struck by one thing in particular, "good people". The fact is that there are no "good" people on this earth. We are all tainted by sin. Even the most devout Christians, the nicest, kindest, most giving people you have ever known are tainted by sin. Everyday that we are alive on this earth is only by the grace and mercy of God. So I guess the real question should be, "Why do good things happen to bad people?"
The answer to this question is made clear in Romans 5: 8, "God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." God loves us so much that He paid the penalty of our sin with His own death, assuring that those who have accepted Jesus Christ as Savior,will have eternal life in heaven. Not what we deserve by any means but what He gives to those who trust the Lord. Plain and simple, despite the evil, sinful nature of our human lives, God still loves us. John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
In a nut shell, none of us deserve the blessings we have and unfortunately bad things do happen to people who seem undeserving of them. But one thing is certain, God will use every situation for good. You may not see it in the moment, but one day it will be revealed to you. Jeremiah 29:11-12 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."
Things are gonna happen to us that we don't understand, but we are secure in the promise of Jesus. In John 16:33, Jesus tells us this, "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Jesus doesn't candy coat it, he says there will be trouble, but he gives us the assurance of victory in him!!
So...when life delivers that swift kick in the gut, don't double over in pain, but stand upright in the knowledge that God's got it!!
Until next time, I'm done asking why!
God Bless,
Cat
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Where's Your Focus?
I started a blog this morning on something that really had me irritated, something that I really felt a need to vent about. The words flew fast a furious from my fingertips and I felt like that blog was gonna turn some heads and I was going to feel so much better when I was done. In mid blog, I had to stop writing to run something to a friend, so I hit the save button and jumped in the car. On the ride there, words and phrases of what I wanted to add to my article swirled in my head and I couldn't wait to tell my friend what I was "chatting" about in the blog. A dear sister in Christ and one of my biggest supporters, I was sure that she would be excited about it.
After exchanging warm hugs, we sat to talk a bit and when she asked what I had on the agenda today, I started to tell her about the blog. I opened my mouth and as I started to tell her what I had written, I began to find it increasingly harder to get the words out of my mouth. I had forgotten the gist of my writing and some of the key points I had written about; my mind was blank. The more I "tried" to talk, the more tongue tied I got and the more ridiculous what had me irritated sounded. My sweet friend said to me, "Go home and re-read what you have written and see if you still want to post it." Huhhh. Not the encouraging words I was expecting but okay.
The thoughts that swirled around in my head on the ride home were far different from the hurricane of words I had before. Now, gentler, softer, thoughts floated in my brain and a silent reminder that I had not ask God to guide my thoughts the first time I started to write. The words that flew from my fingertips were not inspired by the Holy Spirit. They were inspired by the sin of anger; they were self-serving and not in the least encouraging. Not what I intended this blog to be.
So I opened my laptop and hit the delete button; closed my eyes and prayed for His guidance. What I heard was focus on the good. That's it! Focus on the GOOD! I had gotten so embroiled in the one incident that irritated me that I had completely lost track of the good. So here is the GOOD:
This past Saturday I participated in the Rally for RAACE, a motorcycle ride to support the RAACE Foundation, an organization that brings awareness to child abuse, both physical and sexual. RAACE stands for Race Against Abuse of Children Everywhere. Last year was the first year I participated in the Rally and despite a very cloudy, misty day I so enjoyed being a part of it and could not wait for this years event to come.
The first GOOD of that day, was that the event left from the parking lot of my church home. GOOD, one because that's my home, but Really GOOD because it brought potentially non-churched people to the campus to see that God loves bikers too!
The second GOOD was that despite the rainy and cold week preceding the Rally, Saturdays weather was glorious! God blessed this event with bright sunshine and warm temperatures! It's so much more fun to be on a motorcycle in the sun than in the rain!
The third GOOD of the day was that almost 200 motorcycles showed up to support RAACE and raise money for this organization. 200+ bikers united in the cause of protecting our children!
The fourth GOOD was that everyone who rode the 56 mile trek through Harford County made it to our final destination safely!! God had obviously sent an army of angels to protect 200 motorcycles through busy intersections and merging traffic.
The final GOOD and I would have to say this is more of a GREAT than GOOD, it that for the 7th year, despite obstacles, the Rally for RAACE was successful and has brought the message of the RAACE Foundation to the forefront- Protect Our Children!
See, the master of disaster, Satan, can and will wreak havoc wherever he can, to stop the progression of GOOD. The obstacles and distractions that arose were designed to take the focus of the Good and purpose for the rally but fortunately the GOOD that God had planned won out. This is no different for our thoughts. I was so guilty of that this morning. All I was focusing on was the irritants and the GOOD had become blurred. I almost allowed the deceiver to trick me into using my blog for the very opposite of what it was intended to be used for. If we choose to focus on the negative in any situation, negative is what we will get and we will be robbed of the joy that is intended! Focus on the GOOD and the bad don't seem so bad anymore! Change your focus....Focus on the GOOD!
Until next time...I my focus is clear,
God bless,
Cat
PS: Visit www.raace.org for more information on the RAACE Foundation.
After exchanging warm hugs, we sat to talk a bit and when she asked what I had on the agenda today, I started to tell her about the blog. I opened my mouth and as I started to tell her what I had written, I began to find it increasingly harder to get the words out of my mouth. I had forgotten the gist of my writing and some of the key points I had written about; my mind was blank. The more I "tried" to talk, the more tongue tied I got and the more ridiculous what had me irritated sounded. My sweet friend said to me, "Go home and re-read what you have written and see if you still want to post it." Huhhh. Not the encouraging words I was expecting but okay.
The thoughts that swirled around in my head on the ride home were far different from the hurricane of words I had before. Now, gentler, softer, thoughts floated in my brain and a silent reminder that I had not ask God to guide my thoughts the first time I started to write. The words that flew from my fingertips were not inspired by the Holy Spirit. They were inspired by the sin of anger; they were self-serving and not in the least encouraging. Not what I intended this blog to be.
So I opened my laptop and hit the delete button; closed my eyes and prayed for His guidance. What I heard was focus on the good. That's it! Focus on the GOOD! I had gotten so embroiled in the one incident that irritated me that I had completely lost track of the good. So here is the GOOD:
This past Saturday I participated in the Rally for RAACE, a motorcycle ride to support the RAACE Foundation, an organization that brings awareness to child abuse, both physical and sexual. RAACE stands for Race Against Abuse of Children Everywhere. Last year was the first year I participated in the Rally and despite a very cloudy, misty day I so enjoyed being a part of it and could not wait for this years event to come.
The first GOOD of that day, was that the event left from the parking lot of my church home. GOOD, one because that's my home, but Really GOOD because it brought potentially non-churched people to the campus to see that God loves bikers too!
The second GOOD was that despite the rainy and cold week preceding the Rally, Saturdays weather was glorious! God blessed this event with bright sunshine and warm temperatures! It's so much more fun to be on a motorcycle in the sun than in the rain!
The third GOOD of the day was that almost 200 motorcycles showed up to support RAACE and raise money for this organization. 200+ bikers united in the cause of protecting our children!
The fourth GOOD was that everyone who rode the 56 mile trek through Harford County made it to our final destination safely!! God had obviously sent an army of angels to protect 200 motorcycles through busy intersections and merging traffic.
The final GOOD and I would have to say this is more of a GREAT than GOOD, it that for the 7th year, despite obstacles, the Rally for RAACE was successful and has brought the message of the RAACE Foundation to the forefront- Protect Our Children!
See, the master of disaster, Satan, can and will wreak havoc wherever he can, to stop the progression of GOOD. The obstacles and distractions that arose were designed to take the focus of the Good and purpose for the rally but fortunately the GOOD that God had planned won out. This is no different for our thoughts. I was so guilty of that this morning. All I was focusing on was the irritants and the GOOD had become blurred. I almost allowed the deceiver to trick me into using my blog for the very opposite of what it was intended to be used for. If we choose to focus on the negative in any situation, negative is what we will get and we will be robbed of the joy that is intended! Focus on the GOOD and the bad don't seem so bad anymore! Change your focus....Focus on the GOOD!
Until next time...I my focus is clear,
God bless,
Cat
PS: Visit www.raace.org for more information on the RAACE Foundation.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
All About "ME"
I awoke this morning with this overwhelming feeling that I needed to write today. Funny, because I haven't had this strong of a feeling in awhile, so I asked the Lord, "Okay, so what do I write about?" Silence...."I'm waiting, Lord. I felt the nudge now give me the words." Still, silence. So, I sat and I waited and I waited some more. Finally, in a small, almost silent whisper I heard, "Me." I wanted to ignore that response but as is custom for the Holy Spirits urging, the response didn't change. I just kept hearing, "Me." So, here I go.
The "Me" I writing about is not "me"; it's the "Me" who is, who was and who is to come; it's the "Me" that whispered to my heart this morning, Jesus Christ. Now, the subject of Jesus Christ, is something that I could write pages about. I could talk about His love, His grace, His mercy, His compassion, His supremacy, His sacrifice, and His miracles, but for today I want to talk about His desire. The desire that He has for us.
Websters defines desire as to long for or hope for. Jesus longs for a relationship with us. For many the thought of relationship in and of itself is scary. But the relationship that Jesus desires to have with us is not meant to be scary. In fact, relationship with Him, is probably the easiest relationship anyone could have. Unlike our human relationships, where we sometimes feel the need to be someone we are not or we fear disappointing the other, a relationship with Jesus is a come as you are relationship. Jesus, doesn't care what we look like; He understands our mood swings and knows all of our failures; Jesus knows we're not perfect and we are sure to disappoint Him, but Jesus accepts us, just as we are, and loves us just the same. In relationship with Him, there is no scorecard of wrongs or reminders of your weaknesses, there is just pure, unadulterated love and acceptance.
Personally, I struggled with human relationships for years. I never felt that who I am was good enough for any human relationship. I pretended to be who I thought people wanted me to be- an actress on the stage of relationships. I was never, the real me, in front of anyone, because the real me, I was sure would bring disappointment. It wasn't until many years later, that I learned that Jesus Christ desired a relationship with the real me, not the actress, just me and it was the most liberating thing I have ever experienced. I didn't have to go through months of relationship therapy or work through a checklist of wrongs to right to have this relationship; I simply had to run into His waiting arms. I envision His tears of joy as I finally met His desire and He wraps me in His loving arms. There are no feelings of inadequacy or imperfection in this relationship, for in His eyes I am perfect. Through His sacrifice, I am forgiven, therefore I don't have to beg for His forgiveness, He just gives it. Relationship with Jesus is easy, it's free, it's safe, and it ours for the taking, all we have to do is accept and believe.
When you enter into this unconditional kind of relationship with Jesus Christ, the rest of life's relationships become easier. When you can accept that Jesus is accepting of you with all your faults and failures, you find it easier to accept others with all their faults and failures. When you can accept that Jesus forgives all your sins, you find it easier to forgive others. When you enter into a relationship with Jesus, you do away with the scorecards, you love more easily and you accept others more openly. Whew, what a liberating feeling!
If you don't have a relationship with Jesus, please know that the greatest desire of His heart is to know you and for you to know Him. Simply ask Him to come into your heart and accept His infinite love. If you have a relationship with Jesus, know that the greatest desire of His heart is to grow deeper in relationship with you. He wants you to rely on Him in ALL things, the good, the bad and the ugly.
Until next time...this actress has exited stage left!
God Bless,
Cat
The "Me" I writing about is not "me"; it's the "Me" who is, who was and who is to come; it's the "Me" that whispered to my heart this morning, Jesus Christ. Now, the subject of Jesus Christ, is something that I could write pages about. I could talk about His love, His grace, His mercy, His compassion, His supremacy, His sacrifice, and His miracles, but for today I want to talk about His desire. The desire that He has for us.
Websters defines desire as to long for or hope for. Jesus longs for a relationship with us. For many the thought of relationship in and of itself is scary. But the relationship that Jesus desires to have with us is not meant to be scary. In fact, relationship with Him, is probably the easiest relationship anyone could have. Unlike our human relationships, where we sometimes feel the need to be someone we are not or we fear disappointing the other, a relationship with Jesus is a come as you are relationship. Jesus, doesn't care what we look like; He understands our mood swings and knows all of our failures; Jesus knows we're not perfect and we are sure to disappoint Him, but Jesus accepts us, just as we are, and loves us just the same. In relationship with Him, there is no scorecard of wrongs or reminders of your weaknesses, there is just pure, unadulterated love and acceptance.
Personally, I struggled with human relationships for years. I never felt that who I am was good enough for any human relationship. I pretended to be who I thought people wanted me to be- an actress on the stage of relationships. I was never, the real me, in front of anyone, because the real me, I was sure would bring disappointment. It wasn't until many years later, that I learned that Jesus Christ desired a relationship with the real me, not the actress, just me and it was the most liberating thing I have ever experienced. I didn't have to go through months of relationship therapy or work through a checklist of wrongs to right to have this relationship; I simply had to run into His waiting arms. I envision His tears of joy as I finally met His desire and He wraps me in His loving arms. There are no feelings of inadequacy or imperfection in this relationship, for in His eyes I am perfect. Through His sacrifice, I am forgiven, therefore I don't have to beg for His forgiveness, He just gives it. Relationship with Jesus is easy, it's free, it's safe, and it ours for the taking, all we have to do is accept and believe.
When you enter into this unconditional kind of relationship with Jesus Christ, the rest of life's relationships become easier. When you can accept that Jesus is accepting of you with all your faults and failures, you find it easier to accept others with all their faults and failures. When you can accept that Jesus forgives all your sins, you find it easier to forgive others. When you enter into a relationship with Jesus, you do away with the scorecards, you love more easily and you accept others more openly. Whew, what a liberating feeling!
If you don't have a relationship with Jesus, please know that the greatest desire of His heart is to know you and for you to know Him. Simply ask Him to come into your heart and accept His infinite love. If you have a relationship with Jesus, know that the greatest desire of His heart is to grow deeper in relationship with you. He wants you to rely on Him in ALL things, the good, the bad and the ugly.
Until next time...this actress has exited stage left!
God Bless,
Cat
Friday, April 13, 2012
What's the Secret?
On April 9th, my amazing husband and I celebrated 24 years of marriage. It's hard to believe that it has been that long ~ it seems like just yesterday we were saying "I do". We received many congratulation messages and beautiful anniversary cards celebrating our marriage. I also had some ask what our secret is to lasting this many years. My oldest son even commented that many of his friends think its weird that his parents are still together. So I thought I might share some secrets that I've learned over the years.
In all honesty, there were times that I (we) thought we wouldn't make it passed the first, the second, the seventh, or the tenth year. The betting ones in my family, thought it would be really good odds that this marriage wouldn't last. And they were ALMOST right. With the exception of having our children, we did almost everything wrong for the first ELEVEN years of marriage. Sure, we shared a home, bills, child rearing, a bedroom, weekends at the local bar, and an occasional family vacation, but it didn't take long before our marriage became more of a routine than a marriage. Before long, he started doing his thing and I did my thing and we'd meet as we passed in the hallway or if we were lucky at the dinner table; roommates at best.
Those first eleven years threw alot of trouble at us as well. The first five years had us dealing with a sick child. Numerous surgeries and the uncertainty of our son's future, left us hurting and scared, but instead of clinging to one another for support, we dealt with it on our own driving our union further apart. There were financial issues and family illnesses and again, instead of clinging to each other, we allowed these troubles to fester inside. By the time we were eleven years into this "marriage" we were both ready to call it quits. Don't get me wrong, we loved each other, we had just allowed life to interfere for so long that we had forgotten why we got married in the first place.
I wish I could say that the transformation of our marriage and our relationship was quick and easy but it wasn't. Our first step was finding a church home; not an easy undertaking given the fact that my husband was an atheist. But we both realized that doing things our way wasn't working, so this was worth a try and it was there that our journey of reconciliation began. We attended every Bible study available regarding marriage and participated in an intense seminar called His Needs Her Needs where we dissected our marriage to the bone. It was then that we realized that we were missing out on so much more!
Firstly, and most importantly, we both developed a relationship with Jesus Christ. This became the foundation of our marriage and our lives, making everything else come easy. With this firm foundation in place, we began to work on us. One of the most important things we learned was that we are better together than apart. What I mean by that is that dealing with life is so much easier when you do it together and trust in the Lord. Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding but in all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths."
Secondly, we re-examined why we fell in love in the first place. We began doing the little things that came so easily when we were dating. Sweet little love notes and walks in the park; alone time together without the kids and meaningless chats in the moonlight. Before long, we were feeling the kind of love we'd been missing.
Another really important thing we both were reminded of was that marriage is a give and take. We knew that each of us had different things we liked to do and different ways of recharging our batteries. It was okay that we did some things alone, but not everything. We needed to be willing to do some of the things the other liked and also find some things we both enjoyed together. So, I found myself in camouflage clothes, carrying a rifle, in the snow, in the mountains of West Virginia on a deer hunt with my husband. I froze my butt off but I learned to appreciate the peace he found in the silence of the woods and it made him happy. Likewise, he would find himself curled up on the sofa with me and bowl of popcorn watching a Lifetime movie, because that made me happy. Give and take.
When Chuck expressed interest in getting a motorcycle, I was not too thrilled, but we discussed it together and decided that he would get one. My first couple of months on the back of that bike were nerve racking to say the least, but I could see the joy riding the motorcycle brought him and as time went on I began to enjoy it more myself. Wouldn't you know it...I have my own bike now and we still smile at each other when we are side by side. The bikes have become a major part of our lives, not just as an activity to do together, but also as a vessel for spreading the gospel with our church motorcycle ministry, the Mountain Riders. Had I not been willing to try something he enjoyed, I would be missing out on so much. Give and take.
Thirteen years after we almost called it quits, we still leave little love notes; we still have meaningless chats in the moonlight; Chuck will watch a chick flick with me once in awhile; I'll put a worm on a hook with him and we ride side by side on our "steel horses" enjoying life and spreading the gospel.
Separate in some things, we are good. Together in all things, we are best!
Until next time, I'm having coffee with my man on the deck!
God bless,
Cat
In all honesty, there were times that I (we) thought we wouldn't make it passed the first, the second, the seventh, or the tenth year. The betting ones in my family, thought it would be really good odds that this marriage wouldn't last. And they were ALMOST right. With the exception of having our children, we did almost everything wrong for the first ELEVEN years of marriage. Sure, we shared a home, bills, child rearing, a bedroom, weekends at the local bar, and an occasional family vacation, but it didn't take long before our marriage became more of a routine than a marriage. Before long, he started doing his thing and I did my thing and we'd meet as we passed in the hallway or if we were lucky at the dinner table; roommates at best.
Those first eleven years threw alot of trouble at us as well. The first five years had us dealing with a sick child. Numerous surgeries and the uncertainty of our son's future, left us hurting and scared, but instead of clinging to one another for support, we dealt with it on our own driving our union further apart. There were financial issues and family illnesses and again, instead of clinging to each other, we allowed these troubles to fester inside. By the time we were eleven years into this "marriage" we were both ready to call it quits. Don't get me wrong, we loved each other, we had just allowed life to interfere for so long that we had forgotten why we got married in the first place.
I wish I could say that the transformation of our marriage and our relationship was quick and easy but it wasn't. Our first step was finding a church home; not an easy undertaking given the fact that my husband was an atheist. But we both realized that doing things our way wasn't working, so this was worth a try and it was there that our journey of reconciliation began. We attended every Bible study available regarding marriage and participated in an intense seminar called His Needs Her Needs where we dissected our marriage to the bone. It was then that we realized that we were missing out on so much more!
Firstly, and most importantly, we both developed a relationship with Jesus Christ. This became the foundation of our marriage and our lives, making everything else come easy. With this firm foundation in place, we began to work on us. One of the most important things we learned was that we are better together than apart. What I mean by that is that dealing with life is so much easier when you do it together and trust in the Lord. Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding but in all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths."
Secondly, we re-examined why we fell in love in the first place. We began doing the little things that came so easily when we were dating. Sweet little love notes and walks in the park; alone time together without the kids and meaningless chats in the moonlight. Before long, we were feeling the kind of love we'd been missing.
Another really important thing we both were reminded of was that marriage is a give and take. We knew that each of us had different things we liked to do and different ways of recharging our batteries. It was okay that we did some things alone, but not everything. We needed to be willing to do some of the things the other liked and also find some things we both enjoyed together. So, I found myself in camouflage clothes, carrying a rifle, in the snow, in the mountains of West Virginia on a deer hunt with my husband. I froze my butt off but I learned to appreciate the peace he found in the silence of the woods and it made him happy. Likewise, he would find himself curled up on the sofa with me and bowl of popcorn watching a Lifetime movie, because that made me happy. Give and take.
When Chuck expressed interest in getting a motorcycle, I was not too thrilled, but we discussed it together and decided that he would get one. My first couple of months on the back of that bike were nerve racking to say the least, but I could see the joy riding the motorcycle brought him and as time went on I began to enjoy it more myself. Wouldn't you know it...I have my own bike now and we still smile at each other when we are side by side. The bikes have become a major part of our lives, not just as an activity to do together, but also as a vessel for spreading the gospel with our church motorcycle ministry, the Mountain Riders. Had I not been willing to try something he enjoyed, I would be missing out on so much. Give and take.
Thirteen years after we almost called it quits, we still leave little love notes; we still have meaningless chats in the moonlight; Chuck will watch a chick flick with me once in awhile; I'll put a worm on a hook with him and we ride side by side on our "steel horses" enjoying life and spreading the gospel.
Separate in some things, we are good. Together in all things, we are best!
Until next time, I'm having coffee with my man on the deck!
God bless,
Cat
Friday, March 30, 2012
G R A C E: Gift Received At Christ's Expense
In just about one week, we will be celebrating Easter. For some this means fancy dresses and tailored suits, chocolate bunnies and Easter eggs, but for many it is a celebration to mark the resurrection of Jesus Christ and His victory over sin and death.
My Easter basket will not be filled with artificial grass, marshmallow peeps, or stuffed bunnies. My Easter basket will be over-flowing with GRACE. You may be wondering "What is grace?" Grace is favor or kindness shown without regard to the worth or merit of the one who receives it and in spite of what that same person deserves.
Looking at that definition, I can say with certainty that I don't deserve grace. I spent many years lost in the throes of drugs and alcohol; inflicting pain on loved ones out of pure selfishness and living life by my rules with no regard for others. Today, though I try to live a good life, I still struggle with things. I smoke cigarettes; I lose my temper; I sometimes speak without thinking; I can be judgemental and I can hold a grudge. All things that I'm not proud of and all things that some are quick to point out to me; reminding me of my flaws and failures. The fact is, that in this life, I will never be perfect, no one will ever be perfect. We are human, therefore we are an imperfect being.
The good news of the gift of grace, started in a manger and ended on a cross. When Jesus came to earth, He came to bridge the gap between our sinful selves and the Heavenly Father and He did that when He died on the cross and rose from the dead three days later. Why? It's simple...He loves us.
"God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8
Grace is a gift that none of us deserve, yet God freely gives to those who have faith in Christ Jesus and believe that He suffered, died and rose again to save us from our sins. Grace erases the sins of our past and frees us from condemnation.
"God does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:10-12
While others may stand ready to cast a stone or guilt strikes your heart and you find yourself in a crumpled heap on the ground, ashamed and full of sadness, Jesus reaches His hand to you, lifts you from the ground and says, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9
Grace is a Gift Received At Christ's Expense. He did the work, all we have to do is accept it. I can't think of anything more liberating than knowing that when God looks at me, He doesn't see the ugliness of my sin, but only sees the child He loves so much.
Wherever you are in your life and despite what you may of done in your past or may do in your future, God has an Easter basket overflowing with GRACE just for you. All you have to do is accept it and trust that His love for you is unconditional. Nothing can separate us from the love of God!
"Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:39
So, I ask you...What are you anticipating in your Easter basket? The gift of God's grace or a chocolate bunny?
Until next time, I won't have death by chocolate Easter morning, but life in the Risen Lord, thanks to His gift of Grace!
God Bless,
Cat
My Easter basket will not be filled with artificial grass, marshmallow peeps, or stuffed bunnies. My Easter basket will be over-flowing with GRACE. You may be wondering "What is grace?" Grace is favor or kindness shown without regard to the worth or merit of the one who receives it and in spite of what that same person deserves.
Looking at that definition, I can say with certainty that I don't deserve grace. I spent many years lost in the throes of drugs and alcohol; inflicting pain on loved ones out of pure selfishness and living life by my rules with no regard for others. Today, though I try to live a good life, I still struggle with things. I smoke cigarettes; I lose my temper; I sometimes speak without thinking; I can be judgemental and I can hold a grudge. All things that I'm not proud of and all things that some are quick to point out to me; reminding me of my flaws and failures. The fact is, that in this life, I will never be perfect, no one will ever be perfect. We are human, therefore we are an imperfect being.
The good news of the gift of grace, started in a manger and ended on a cross. When Jesus came to earth, He came to bridge the gap between our sinful selves and the Heavenly Father and He did that when He died on the cross and rose from the dead three days later. Why? It's simple...He loves us.
"God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8
Grace is a gift that none of us deserve, yet God freely gives to those who have faith in Christ Jesus and believe that He suffered, died and rose again to save us from our sins. Grace erases the sins of our past and frees us from condemnation.
"God does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:10-12
While others may stand ready to cast a stone or guilt strikes your heart and you find yourself in a crumpled heap on the ground, ashamed and full of sadness, Jesus reaches His hand to you, lifts you from the ground and says, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9
Grace is a Gift Received At Christ's Expense. He did the work, all we have to do is accept it. I can't think of anything more liberating than knowing that when God looks at me, He doesn't see the ugliness of my sin, but only sees the child He loves so much.
Wherever you are in your life and despite what you may of done in your past or may do in your future, God has an Easter basket overflowing with GRACE just for you. All you have to do is accept it and trust that His love for you is unconditional. Nothing can separate us from the love of God!
"Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:39
So, I ask you...What are you anticipating in your Easter basket? The gift of God's grace or a chocolate bunny?
Until next time, I won't have death by chocolate Easter morning, but life in the Risen Lord, thanks to His gift of Grace!
God Bless,
Cat
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